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Instructor Commentary: The numbers are not placed in the essay by the student, but by the Instructor. The footnote numbers correspond to Instructor Responses which follow the essay below. This essay is strong, but still needs some revision. The thesis should be stronger. Note that the writer asks a question in place of a thesis. The answer to this question would be the thesis and should be placed at the end of the Introduction. Note too that the writer still needs to check on correct punctuation for APA Documentation Style.
Sheri Tepper’s novel, Gate To Women’s Country,
explores a world where two very distinct societies, women’s society
and warrior’s society, are separated by walls. These walls have
been erected as a result of a devastating time in history and the lessons
a select group of women have learned. The walls are both visible and
invisible, having been constructed to ensure the safety of the society
established within them. This safety net of walls is maintained by selectively
(and secretively) breeding men and women with non-aggressive genetic
traits. Though available to those in the general population of Women’s
Country with the insight and wisdom to see it, this, and other information,
is not public knowledge.1 Gate To Women’s Country is a story of social
hierarchy at work. Social hierarchies create a system of loss and denial,
of suspicion and paranoia. They create structures of pain and structures
of privilege. The predominant social structure of our world is that
of patriarchy, which plays a major role in the people we become. It
is also the history of the story of Gate To Women’s Country. How
does the society represented in Gate To Women’s Country compare
to our modern society?2 The essays we have been reading have focused on social
hierarchies and how we become who we are as a result. Allan Johnson,
author of The Gender Knot: Unraveling our Patriarchal Legacy, discusses
how patriarchy—a male dominated, identified, centered and controlled
society that involves the oppression of women (Johnson, p. 5)—is
used to maintain and create invisible walls and barriers for women while
maintaining privileges for men.3 In the same breath, patriarchy
creates loss for men in insidious, covert ways. The invisibility of
the institution of patriarchy makes it difficult, at best, for men to
grasp their own loss, failures or weakness. An example of this would
be the workaholic father who suddenly decides to participate in his
family’s life, but whose attention is then rejected by the family.4
For men, patriarchy creates a need for control and dominance, which
is frequently internalized by men as "the job of being the breadwinner."5
Men often spend inordinate amounts of time at work, striving to succeed
and provide material objects for their families, ignoring everyone’s,
including their own, emotional needs. When an absentee father suddenly
decides he wants emotional fulfillment from his family, the family members
do not know how to act toward this seemingly strange request, rejecting
their father’s request. Because he feels he is being a good father
and providing for his family by working so hard, the man blames the
family for his hurt feelings, saying they don’t appreciate all
of his hard work to provide the "things" (i.e., material objects)
they need. Even though this father does not feel privilege (after all,
he is working day and night to provide for his family), the workings
and privilege of a patriarchal society is such that the misery and suffering
men go through is directly linked to their participation in this system.
(Johnson, 174)6 Any type of oppressive system creates a social hierarchy,
pitting one person against another; elevating one person above another.
In his essay, Pigskin, Patriarchy and Pain, Don Sabo talks about the
physical and mental pain social hierarchies, such as patriarchy, racism,
sexism, etc. create. ""Hierarchy breeds inequity and inequity
breeds pain. To remain stable, the hierarchy must either justify the
pain or explain it away." (Sabo, 375) The system of patriarchy
imposes values on men that dictate they be successful, in control of
their endeavors at all costs, and be "manly" or they are seen
as losers, wimps, sissies, faggots. (Avicolli, 377) The pain inflicted
on non-conformists is then justified through dehumanizing clichés
such as "They’re not real men." or "Only girls cry."7
Patriarchy rewards those who have learned to internalize
the pain and injury involved in its brutality, especially in the area
of sports such as football ("Take it like a man."). The boys
and young men that have learned to play the part of sports animals,
"fanatically aggressive and ruthlessly competitive." (Sabo,
374) are publicly idolized and revered, receiving recognition from their
male peers. While these boys (and eventually grown men) were breaking
their bones and wearing their casts, bandages, neck braces, etc., as
trophies, was there anyone telling them the physical toll this physical
aggression would be taking on their bodies? The social structure of
patriarchy places such high-esteem and dollar value on "sports
heroes", the physically destructive nature of sports as a whole,
is being explained away, or justified, by the rewards (money and stature)
of the games (for the selected few). The stars are paid unimaginable
amounts of money and looked upon as gods. And when they fail in some
aspect of their lives, either personal or professional, their behavior
is justified as "only human", their inappropriate behavior
is excused and they go on their merry way, as if nothing happened.8 An act as simple as throwing a baseball is viewed from
a male-centered perspective (Messner, p. 57), despite the fact that
a female throws a ball in a way that is physically natural and non-destructive
to the arm and its related parts. Perhaps, as part of the continual
sports commercial blitz, Joe Namath or Dick Butkus or Mohammad Ali or
Nolan Ryan or any number of "sports heroes" who are now crippled
and debilitated as a result of their participation, should speak out
and inform their admirers of the long-term dangers involved.9
Running throughout Gate To Women’s Country is
the theme of suspicion and paranoia on the part of the men living outside
the social structure created by Women’s Country. One of the main
concerns of the men living in the Marthaville’s garrison is their
continual worry about the women keeping secrets from them and plotting
against them. They are continually afraid of anyone or anything new
or different from them and their lack of knowledge about the world outside
their garrison walls causes this paranoia, with a need to "get
them before they get us." The warriors plot and scheme to gain
the women’s secret information, drawing the most easily influenced
boys into their scheming. "It’s a matter of honor" is
the philosophy used to explain their actions and why the boys must obey
them. Akin to calling a man or boy "chicken" or a "girl",
forcing one person to feel the pressure of maintaining status and face
for the entire gender, otherwise taking everyone down with them, or
as Allan Johnson eludes to, "[turning] reality on its head with
false parallels." (Johnson, p. 180)10 One characteristic of patriarchy is the violence used
against females as a statement about power and control. In Gate To
Women’s Country, this is illustrated through the narrative
of Stavia’s capture by the Holylanders, where females are viewed
as possessions of men—a status of worthlessness. The males in Holylander
are willing to break the legs of their females to make them more compliant
and "easier to catch" if they should choose to try and run
away from their advances. In the United States today, domestic violence
is the leading cause of injury for women. One-third of all female murder
victims are killed by their spouse or significant other, ex- or otherwise.
Domestic violence is at epidemic proportions in this country. (Sklar,
p. 261)11 In her essay," The Social Construction of Gender,"
Judith Lorber supports patriarchy as an oppressive system by providing
examples of how female anatomy, physiology and biology has been learned
and taught from a male perspective. When a women is seeking medical
assistance, they are further hindered by a lack of female doctors. How
can a male doctor relate to a woman going through menopause? 12
How comfortable, and honest, is a teenage girl seeking medical help
for a sexually transmitted disease going to be when she’s facing
a male doctor that reminds her of her father, or worse yet, grandfather?
13 A point taken by Sandra Lipsitz Ben in" In a Male-Centered
World, Female Differences are Transformed into Female Disadvantages"
describes how women, when ill, frequently display different symptoms
then men, but it is from the male perspective that disease research,
and female biological function, is conducted. Again, how can a male
doctor relate to the symptoms displayed by a female when all he has
been taught is based on male symptoms?14 The leaders of Women’s Country have taken their medical
knowledge in a different direction and are using it to secretly eliminate
the genetic traits of "penis worshipers…trumpets and drums
and games…" (Tepper, 295) By understanding their history and
the causes of war, the Councilwomen of Women’s Country utilize
secretive birth control methods and selective breeding techniques to
eliminate the aggressive traits of the men, and hopefully ensuring their
survival. But the privilege of this knowledge and the status of being
a Councilwoman come with its own price—it cannot be shared. This
becomes clear in a conversation Morgot has with her daughter, Stavia,
while Stavia is recovering from the abuse she endured at the hands of
the Holylanders, which occurred when she was betrayed by Chernon, in
his quest to learn the secrets of Women’s Country (at the prompting
of the paranoid garrison commanders). Because Stavia has become pregnant
by Chernon, a warrior, she is being given the choice as to whether or
not she wants to keep "a warrior’s child". Previously,
Stavia had broken the Women’s Country ordinances by sharing books
with Chernon and endangering everyone. Because she is about to be told
some extraordinarily privilege information, Morgot needs to elicit an
oath of confidentiality from Stavia, telling Stavia she wouldn’t
be allowed to "leave [the] room" without pledging her oath.
Stavia responds to Morgot by questioning Morgot’s willingness to
let her, Stavia, be killed. Morgot responds very matter-of-factly, "I
wouldn’t ‘let’. There would be nothing I could do."
but continues with a very poignant statement, "Oh, Stavvy, we’ve
taken so long, worked so hard, sacrificed so much—our lovers, our
sons…" Words and feelings only someone who has struggled to
overcome oppression can truly appreciate and understand.15 The story in Gate To Women’s Country, closes
with the warriors from the Marthaville garrison plotting to invade the
town. The Councilwomen of Marthaville, having been made aware of this
plot, conspire with the other women’s councils to eliminate the
Marthaville garrison completely and reduce the size of the other garrisons.
Paranoia and aggression on the part of the male warriors, coupled with
the women’s paranoia of the men and their need for self-preservation,
are the causes of these drastic steps.16 In Gate To Women’s Country, the aggressive
and domination traits of men caused the devastation of the world that
killed innocent women and children. The surviving women are working
toward a new society, selecting the least aggressive men to father new
generations. The male-dominant traits that caused the near-annihilation
of the society preceding Women’s Country were slowly being eliminated,
creating a world where its inhabitants could live in peace, rather than
under a constant threat of war.17 Patriarchy has been a mainstay of our society for so long,
it is difficult to think along any different lines and clearly see any
different view of our world. Unfortunately, patriarchy is alive and
well today. 18 Tonight, there was a commercial on TV for a new prime
time "reality show" being premiered, "Extreme Makeover".
This show will feature participants (two females and one male) receiving
Botox injections, undergoing plastic surgery, etc., because " everyone
wants to look their best." We live in a fast-paced, visual society
and any flaw someone has is magnified a thousand fold when compared
to the supermodels that are flashed across our TV screens and shown
on the cover of every magazine around. Plastic surgeons abound and provide
the required beauty shortcuts our society demands. As eating disorders
and depression continue to rise in females of all ages (Hesse-Biber,
pp 527-533), this new television show is a sad reflection on where we
are headed. The heroines of our young women tout plastic surgery as
a beauty enhancement and a way to feel better about themselves. (Gerhard,
395)19 With the majority of television executives being male,
"Extreme Makeover" is another example of patriarchy in action—males
displaying their version of perfection, males controlling the view of
the world everyone sees, males pushing females to fit their standard
of beauty. The only thing sadder than this show being hyped as entertainment
is the willingness of the participants to be part of the entertainment
circus.20 The evening news is once again compromised of suicide
bombings in the Middle East, talk of "weapons of mass destruction",
the war against Iraq, the war on terrorism, shootings and killings in
our own country. I look at the pictures that go along with these news
stories and see the faces of those involved in and leading these conflicts,
and see the faces of our world’s men. I see patriarchal ideals
facing each other down, with neither side willing to budge an inch nor
compromise in any way. I hear our own President continually talking
of war against this country or that country and I have to wonder where
our patriarchy history is taking us. I see no one in power having the
courage to take a stand against this showdown of dominance and aggression.
Does our patriarchal world stand a chance of survival?21 Though Gate To Women’s Country is a fictional story, the story behind the creation of the society it represents has many parallels to our current world situation. The entire system of patriarchy sanctifies and glorifies war. Memorials are built to honor war and the warriors who died. History books tell the stories of conflict and conquest from a male point of view. But what about the innocents of war who are killed? What about the millions of women and children who have died, and will continue to die, as a result of man’s need to be dominant and in control? Why are there no monuments to them? Who will remember them? I don’t want end up like the females in Gate to Women’s Country—small, isolated pockets of women who are secretly working to breed a gentler, less aggressive male species. As individuals, we have to take a stand and work to eliminate all types of oppression, not just patriarchy. Only then does the human race stand a chance of survival.22 WORKS CITED The Gender Knot: Unraveling Our Patriarchal Legacy.
Allan G. Johnson. 1997. Temple Press. Philadelphia, Pennsylvania Race, Class and Gender in the United States. Paula
S. Rothenberg. 2001. Worth Publishers. New York, New York. Gate To Women’s Country. Sheri S. Tepper. Doubleday Publishers. 1988. New York, New York.
Instructor Comments: Page: 1
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